…being the first in what will almost certainly be a weekly feature EVERY MONDAY on the Plan B blog wherein i lob a bunch of insultingly reductive questions toward new talent and they answer with street heat, or something.

the introductory participants in what will doubtless become a historic series of cultural exchanges i fully expect to be propping up the national curriculum in a few decades are buttonhead.

described with heat-seeking precision as ‘The Deerhoof of Peckham’ waaaay(ish) back in Plan B #23 (july 2007) by Frances, the only other thing you need to know before embarking on a MySpace Safari to the tempting link above is that they are currently looking for a singer who sounds sweet and innocent, ruling YOU out, for starters.

but before you go, here are their quizzical answers to my whimsical questions…

Who are you (individually and collectively)? What does each member bring to the group? (musical and familial/friend group role plz)

Eloise Rhubarb Goulder - Violence Kite
Tobias Staffordshire Jaffa Cake Jones - Cutty Cutty Friend
Ross Jackpot Samson - Huge Urine Smoothing Unit
Valentina Skin-Jab Magaletti - Turkey Skip Fit

Where are you from? How did that shape/injure/hurt you? What?s the best thing about there? Where are you aimed next? Ross comes from Cornwall: “The best thing is there are too many Bladders. People have four on average, some have eight”, Eloise is an Oxford lady: “got spoke bladders”, Tobias hails from Staffordshire, “otherwise known as bladder” and Valentina originated in Bari, Italy, born next to Ghandi’s sandal (nearly injuring her): ‘Bari’, of course, is Italian for Bladder. We’d all like to move to Bladder Hampton (Hemp Pimp Whimper).

Who are yr main ‘influences’? (Or, who have you come together to DESTROY?) Which other new bands would you recommend (if any)? Go listen - I Love Sarah (myspace.com/ilovesarahilovesarah), Hot Silk Pockets (myspace.com/hotsilkpockets), Alas Alak Alaska (myspace.com/alasalakalaska), Yolk (myspace.com/yolk2006)

What is: a) Yr three-point manifesto, b) Yr immediate plan-of-action? c) Yr long-term goal? a) Triangle. b) To prepare for shows coming up in November. c) To be the first band to play in front of an all-canine audience at the Albert Hall.

What are yr songs mostly, y’know, ‘about’? What’s the song (so far) (um, that’s on yr MySpace) that says the most about you and why? We write about the following… Tortoises going to hell with ear disease, Steve, Labradors jumping into cranberry lakes to cure global R.S.I., Prawn men digging up big rats, Forest Dean Incest, Chris Weller, Corgi Booby Traps (by fork in the plug socket), Deported Turkish Immigrants, Piglet Stroking. (None of the above is a lie)

Best gig/tour/rehearsal anecdote goes here:
This also happened to us once.

Posted on Monday, September 24th, 2007by kicking_k